Debunking The Toxic Ideologies From The Manosphere

Today, I want to deep dive how the entire culture around the "manosphere" and how it can lead you down a very bad path. We will reason from first principles on a majority of the issues discussed. I offer sympathy to men who are struggling and help you see exactly how you can help them or escape yourselves.

Manosphere

The manosphere is a reaction to feminism, women rights have been unjustly suppressed for a long time. If you have a distaste for feminism, it's because it's naturally threatening to any low-value man who does not want to lose his position, status and preference they have over women.

If the manosphere is appealing to you that's because it feeds off your inadequacy as a man. Whereas being in your lousy configuration that you might be in right now, you are now forced to "level up" in order to reap the same fulfilling rewards socially with the opposite sex.

Have you ever noticed that only young men believe in the manosphere? This is not a coincidence. Women can now become more choosey with the type of partner they want, can survive on their own, which is exactly what the lousy men don't want as they effectively get priced out of the dating market.

What the manosphere people don't understand is that they are lousy to begin with for anyone to be attracted to him. What the feminist don't understand is that there needs to be a way for people like me to educate men on what to do so that they can be the attractive man you crave to meet!

Basically the manosphere preys on these few things:

1. Your inability to get laid
2. You inability to get materialistic rewards (money etc)

They are able to prey on you for a few very good reasons:

1. Nobody taught you how to socialize
2. You are the first generation to grow up with social media
3. Nobody taught you how to treat, attract and meet women
4. Last stage capitalism, hard to become successful.

I really sympathize with you, I do. I am a part of Gen-Z just like you, and fortunately enough, I've managed to find my way out. What I can promise you is that the manosphere will destroy your ability to have happy and fulfilling relationships if you do not wise up today to what I have in store for you.

All The Pills

Redpill, purple pill, black pill and rainbow pills and will lead to a terrible life. What you should have is no pill, and that's exactly what FriendlyWrenChilling is. I've only took the good aspects of each ideology, combining pickup, spirituality, life coaching, self-improvement to make a holistic education when it comes to dating.

In my opinion, there is a "great recession" in social activity. Whereas the men before the internet era could meet and talk to other people so that they can develop competent social skills, now this is not possible despite it being the most connected time in human history.

The isolation and loneliness caused by the internet revolution caused the new generation to have a new set of problems, which is what the manosphere effectively managed to capture and turn into an ideology.

The mainstream has failed to effectively solve this growing problem of lonely men and offer concrete solutions for them. They do double the damage when they do not acknowledge the needs of these young men and how big of a blow to your self-esteem when you are unable to work hard and find a solution to your problems.

Young men do not enjoy the same levels of social cohesion as young women. Solidarity between women is strong and there is a sense of unity among women, whereas for these young men, are off to fend for themselves. This is the problem that is not being addressed.

You can think of the ideologies splitting into two. One being the victimized people (ie. blackpill), and those of the empowered people (ie. redpill, pickup). Problems are more pronounced and obvious on the empowered side, because these people are willing to work for their success and they compensate by turning these techniques up to 11/10.

Echo Chambers

Fundamentally, there is no difference between redpill, blackpill, MGTOW, pickup etc. in the sense that they stem from the same core issue and problems. These subcultures just have different solutions when it comes to said problems.

You must understand, that you as a young guy, there are many people in the internet right now trying to prey on your immaturity. To prey on that monkey mind of yours that thinks that immensely valuable things, can be earned quickly with some "simple techniques."

If you really subscribe to these echo chambers, what will really happen is that you will drive away all the ethical people in your life. Serious people can see through your character very quickly and identify your level of development and trustworthy-ness.

What is even worse is that the reality you hold internally will be reflected externally. So whatever you believe about women, that will be reflected in your life. You better becareful when you subscribe to these ideologies because it will translate to the results you are trying to avoid.

Pickup Culture Pitfalls

If you're looking for a way out, pickup does work. Because it provides a framework for you to learn and socialize with the opposite sex. It gives you concrete techniques which you can go off and do deliberate practice. In that sense pickup treats dating as a skill (because it is) instead of an ideology to operate upon.

See pickup for what it is. A tool. Pickup in itself does not teach how to become a great man. Pickup does not teach how to have ethics and integrity. Pickup does not teach how to have a fulfilling relationship. These skills are found outself of pickup, and are rarely taught in the holistic presentation you have found in FriendlyWrenChilling.

Pickup only teaches how to walk up and introduce yourself to a girl in an attractive way, bring her out on dates and make her your girlfriend as a result of that. That is it. Anything outside this definition does not fit into the essence of pickup, and is added in through outside intrepretations, biases and personal regrets.

Also understand that pickup works in isolation with the world. The average man requires 2000 approaches to fix all his inner issues to transform himself so that he is "date worthy." Can you imagine that every single man in the world did 2,000 approaches? In this sense, pickup has not yet managed to innovate a solution for mass consumption.

For pickup to go mainstream, this requires a structural change to pickup itself. First, pickup must purge itself of any misogyny and toxic nonsense. Second, the men who practices pickup must have integrity and practice the skills giving consideration of his "eco-footprint." Third, it must denounce bad actors within the industry itself, veiling toxic masculinity as "pickup" practices and dissociating themselves with these "manosphere" characters who promote unethical practices.

A societal shift also needs to occur. Women, feminist and olden men who can serve as role models must be more accomodating to struggling young men and offer support and guidance. Pickup in it's healthies form can help every single man have the ability to approach women he finds attractive, in which the skill would not be abused by "mass approaching" similarly the way a newbie would learn.

Pickup artists should have a "eco-friendly blueprint" and be conscientious about the way he influences and impact the people around him and society at large. That is my conclusion and the way I approach and see things.

Cultures Outside Pickup

The cultures outside pickup are particularly problematic, as it does not serve the members of their ideology a way out. Serving as a way for their communities to bitch and moan without actually providing a solution unlike pickup. With all the problems within pickup, at least it's members can eventually escape and solve their problems who will serve as a net positive to society. This prospect is not available for the men who are in MGTOW, blackpill and so on.

These communities thrive on misinformation and misinformed insecurities. For example we can see this in blackpill, where they target men who have an insecurity about their height. Another example can be pulled from Incel culture, as they press on men who have downfalls when it comes to women and direct that attention outwards to demonize women instead of taking responsibility for their own follies.

In a sense these subcultures has it's function. It gives it's members temporary solace and security and an explanation for their problems. But these communities are only kicking the can down the road, as the core problems are never really addressed seriously. For these members to escape, their resentment have to build up enough to question his beliefs and attitudes about his orientation to women. In that sense, tragedy ensues.

Pickup Influences From Outside Unrelated Cultures

Some are wise enough to realize that these manosphere ideologies does not work and jump ship to pickup as a solution. Unfortunately, they do not escape without battlescars, and brings his personal problems into the practices of pickup.

Think about it, there should be nothing wrong with approaching a woman respectfully because you found her attractive. But because of these "battle-scarred men", they bring their own pitfalls into the practice, after a few good years of this, society and included pickup into the realm of the manosphere.

You dear reader, should not contribute to this statistic. Reform starts from an individual informing his friends. In this sense, you serve as a role model for others to emulate.

Practical Advice For The Man Leaving The Manosphere

First thing you should do is stop consuming content from these "influencers" online and move towards sane self-improvement gurus like Ali Abdall. Also forget about pickup, if your life is so desperate to the point you can be influenced by manosphere ideologies, you need some time to build the correct epistemology by building your life from the ground up.

Valueable things in life requires serious dedication to wisdom, truth and integrity. It requires work ethic and years and years of hard work. Get the basics of life in order. If you have a job, become the #1 employee in your company. If you are a student, get straight As in your studies. This will build a strong work ethic for you to rely on in the future.

Also explore and understand yourself from the ground up. Know what you like and enjoy to do in life and explore possibilities. In your current configuration you are probably unable to make decisive decision in your life. You need time to discover aspects of reality you enjoy before committing seriously pursuing a path in life.

If what you enjoy is sleeping, eating and avoiding hard work recognize how ridiculous you sound. These are not what serious people do in their lives. To take control on your life you need what Cal Newport says as "career capital"

Career capital is when you build up unqiue and valueable skills where people start noticing for your abilities in itself. When you have nothing valueble to offer to the world, then you are at the whims of others who have the career capital (what you understand as "the matrix"). You're not stuck in the matrix, you're just too useless to be useful to society, and in return, society does not give you what you want because you're not a net-positive contributor. Please buy the book "So Good They Can't Ignore You By Cal Newport"

What have I just said? Let's recap:

1. Get your life in order with the basics (job, studies)
2. Commit yourself to build a little bit of career capital (rare and valuable skills)
3. Have work ethic and become a successful contributor of society
4. Only then, start learning pickup using these foundations

What the successful "chads" don't tell you is that they took around 2 years on average to get these foundations right in their lives before they started dating women. You can't jump into the dating pool as a hooligan, because you'll only attract hooligans and clowns just like yourself. What a waste of time.

Basic self-improvement is what you need. Very very basic self-improvement that is not even discussed in FriendlyWrenChilling. FWC is actually an advanced self-improvement vehicle for dating specifically. I teach from the asusmption that you have integrity, a good work ethic and basic foundations such as the ability to have a job and manage money well. Most importantly, listen and learn from sane, mainstream self improvement gurus before you explore fringe solutions such as the one you're reading now.

Conclusion

Wishing you the best of luck breaking out of the manosphere. I hope you have taken the perspectives in this article seriously, and commit to making yourself a man who has integrity and character. I think I have done a pretty good job highlighting the pitfalls of the manosphere and within pickup in itself and offered a solution.

That's it for me. Best of luck. Please check out my other posts and practice everything holistically. Send me an email if you want a specific topic written. You can see "coaching" to see if I have room to onboard new students.

Cheers,
FriendlyWrenChilling.